Romantic Parody
by lambo989
Summary: A basic love stroy between Irvine and Selphie after the origional events in the game


"Irvine Kinneas, stop that right now!" Selphie's angered voice reverberated through the halls of Balamb Garden as her petite figure furiously stomped up the much taller one of her boyfriend's, Garden's resident ladies man Irvine Kinneas. He was currently standing by the Garden's directory, exuding his irresistible Galbadian flirtatious charm, coaxing two new SeeD transfers from the newly founded Esthar Garden into dining with him that evening. At the sight of the enraged Selphie, both girls quickly declined and scampered off, seeking to avoid her wrath. Selphie may be small, but she had a temper twice her height. Irvine turned to his girlfriend with exasperation. "Look what ya' did! I was just bein' friendly, offering to show 'em around since they're new an' all. Hyne, why don't ya' grow up?! I'm leaving for Deling, don't even think of following me" he shouted back at her. Selphie stopped in her tracks and recoiled, her large emerald eyes filling with tears. She couldn't believe Irvine was being so mean to her. Sure, they'd always had a playful relationship-Irvine flirted with other girls, Selphie pouted and got mad, Irvine apologized and bought her something, and everything was resolved until the next time Irvine's roving eye fell upon another female and the cycle repeated itself. But now, a year after the defeat of Ultimecia, it seemed as though things were in demise. Irvine's inability to focus on his girl angered Selphie, and her bountiful cheery optimism and excessive energy irritated the sniper. Without another word, Selphie turned on her heel and fled to the Quad. (I don't have a fancy car To get to you I'd walk a thousand miles) Nida had watched the exchange quietly from outside the elevator. It saddened him greatly to see Selphie cry; he'd much rather have her cheery smile and bouncy hair light up his day. It angered him that Irvine cared so little for the vibrant girl. If you were my girl. he whispered silently, I'd be by your side everyday. Not even a thousand women could pull me away from you. Nida had been noticing Selphie since she had transferred from Trabia, admiring her from a distance, lacking to courage to even speak to her. And then Irvine had come along, sweeping Selphie off her feet like Nida dreamed of doing every night, dashing his hopes. Of course she fell for his looks, his charm, his accuracy with the gun, his courage-after all, he did help save the world while all I did was pilot Garden, he thought bitterly. He doubted she even remembered him from the SeeD exam; he was an ordinary, average-at-everything guy, they type no one could pick out in a crowd. With a weary sigh, he directed his steps to the Quad, vowing to make that cheery smile of hers light up her face. (I don't care, if he buys you nice things Does his gifts come from the heart. I don't know) Nida walked to the Quad and found Selphie curled up into a tight ball, eyes closed, on a patch of grass underneath a shady oak. He lightly rested his hand on her shoulder, quivering slightly at the contact with her fair skin. How I wish I could take her into my arms and hold her, he thought longingly. Selphie opened her tear-stained eyes in hopes that Irvine had come to apologize. Instead of his tall frame and his cowboy hat, she found a black-haired and much shorter one. "Hiya Nida," she said with a disappointed sigh. "You remember my name?" he asked incredulously. Selphie gave him a sad smile. "Sure. You passed the SeeD exam with Squall, Zell, and me, and you piloted Garden when it began moving." "Wow. no one ever remembers who I am," he commented with slight bitterness, sitting down beside her. As he did, his eyes caught a glimpse of a shimmering golden ring on her finger. (But if you were my girl. I'd make it so we'd never be apart.) "What's that?" he inquired softly. Selphie twirled the ring about her finger before removing it. "Irvine's latest 'I'm-sorry-for-sleeping-with-someone-else, please-take-me-back' gift," she replied, glaring at it. "It's beautiful," Nida whispered, feeling his heart sink in his chest. With his present (and already seen as very high) salary, it would take him at least six months to earn enough to buy her something like that. The ring was probably worth less than a third of Irvine's exorbitant monthly salary. He sighed; how could he ever compete with that? All he had to offer was his loyalty, friendship, and undying love. Irvine could satisfy even the slightest whim she had. He sighed again; it was a losing battle, a waste of time. She'd never want to be with someone like me, he thought sadly. (But my love is all I have to give, Without you I don't think I can live I wish I could give the world to you. But love is all I have to give) "I'd rather have him be loyal to me than have this worthless ring," Selphie replied, tossing it into the lush green grass that surrounded the oak. She didn't care if it got lost; she never wanted to see it again. It was just a constant reminder that Irvine cheated on her and she was naïve enough to take him back and believe his promises that it would never happen again. She hugged her knees to her chest and for the first time, shared with someone her relationship problems. "He thinks he can just buy his way out of all his 'slipups', like an expensive dinner or a golden chain will undo the hurt. I guess it's my fault; I'm foolish enough to believe him time and time again when he says he's sorry and that he loves me. you would think that after a year I would know better," she continued morosely, with a heavy sigh. She turned her head to look at Nida. He was actually listening to her, not interrupting her, watching her intently, waiting for her to continue. Irvine never listened to her; he always thought he was the authority in everything and made decisions without Selphie's input. It irritated her how he seemed to think she wasn't capable of seriously contributing to decisions; how he always treated her like a child. Nida seemed to consider her words important, worth something. It made her feel loved, cherished, appreciated instead of taken for granted. (When you talk (when you talk) Does it seem like he's not even listening To a word you say? That's okay babe, Just tell me your problems I'll try my best to kiss them all away) "Go on, I'm listening," Nida urged, whispering softly. Selphie nodded and continued. "I'm tired of him looking at every woman but me; tired of pretending to be the happy couple we're not. When we're around the rest of the gang, we're the fairytale couple, but behind closed doors, it's not the same it was a year ago, right after our return from Time Compression." She sighed again, resting her chin on her knees. "I wish we were more like Squall and Rinoa; the Lion and the Angel, forever meant to be. They're the true fairytale couple, no pretending, totally devoted to each other. That's what I thought Irvine and I had, back in the beginning," she finished, wistfully looking at the cloudless blue sky. "That could be in part because Rinoa would scratch Squall's eyes out if he ever dared look at someone else," Nida commented with humor, hoping to draw a smile from Selphie's lips. Selphie let her emerald gaze caress the velvet sky a second longer before turning to Nida with a hint of a smile. "True. She'd probably call him a meanie and cast Petrify on him before he could run away or something. I guess being a sorceress has its perks." Nida grinned, glad he'd been able to put a semblance of a smile on her youthful face. If only that smile would last forever, he thought wistfully, watching Selphie resume her slumped posture. She looked heartbreakingly lonely, and it hurt Nida to see her like this. She was supposed to be cheery, a sunflower, luminous and bright-she had to smile. Almost unconsciously, he found himself wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulders. (Does he leave (does he leave) When you need him the most?  
  
Does his friends get all your time?  
  
Baby please. I'm on my knees Praying for the day that you'll be mine) Selphie leaned back against Nida's comforting arm, enjoying the support it offered. Irvine had never really been there for her-whenever they had one of their many break-ups, the times when she most needed him to be around, he would immediately depart for Galbadia and leave the woeful Selphie in the hands of her friends until he decided he wanted her back and returned, half drunk, to Garden. It had always been the rest of the Orphanage Gang that helped Selphie get over Irvine, only to fall back again the minute he stepped through Garden's main gate exuding his intoxicating allure. Then they fought, broke up once more, Irvine left, and Selphie was left again, alone and melancholy to rely on her friends. As he watched her, Nida was suddenly struck by an idea. I may not be able to buy her diamond rings, but I'm willing to give it all I've got just to see that smile, he thought with confidence. "Hey Selphie. I have an idea. It's not as good as that ring, but hopefully it'll cheer you up. I hate seeing you so down; you're supposed to be the endless ball of energy and optimism-you're supposed to smile. Whaddaya say I teach you to pilot Garden?" he inquired. Selphie perked up-she loved piloting things. The Ragnarok's pilot seat was her favorite place, but as of late, Squall had tried to keep her away from the controls. She often wondered why; she'd only flown upside down half the way to Esthar. "Really? You'd do that for me?" she asked, jumping up from her crouched position. "Sure, anything for a friend in need," Nida replied, stumbling back from the forceful hug Selphie was giving him. Friend. the word had a false ring in his ears. He didn't want to be just a friend; he wanted her to look at him the way she looked at Irvine before their fights. Nida sighed again, enjoying the feel of her petite body enveloped in his own, larger one. (But my love is all I have to give Without you I don't think I can live I wish I could give the world to you. But love is all I have to give Oooh to you) As much as he wanted to stay like that forever, he knew Selphie didn't share his feelings. To her, this was just a friendly embrace, but to him it was the fulfillment of a dream. Many a night, his last waking thoughts involved the petite brunette; he could almost feel the sensation of her soft skin against his own. And now it was happening-albeit not it in the way he may have wished-and he felt electricity coursing down his veins at the contact. He briefly wondered if Irvine felt anything remotely similar when the diminutive beauty was wrapped in his strong embrace. If that was the case, he was the luckiest man alive. For Nida, this was heaven, bliss, pure elation. even if Selphie didn't know it. Please Hyne, if there is one thing you grant me in all my life, let it be this; let me at least have a chance to take all her misery away and love her the way she deserves, Nida thought, eyes closed, tenderly rubbing his cheek over the top of Selphie's silken cinnamon locks. Selphie felt Nida's caress and pulled away slightly, emerald eyes wide with confusion, taking in his blissful appearance. Could he feel something for her? The thought struck her as odd; come on, this was Nida, her fellow SeeD and classmate, pilot of Balamb Garden, Triple Triad expert, friend when she was in need. He couldn't be attracted to her, at all, could he? Of course not, the thought was preposterous; she was just fooling herself in her dejection of her and Irvine's latest break-up. I'm on the rebound, she reasoned, and Nida was just here to console me, nothing more, she stated firmly. Why would he like me of all people anyway? He is awfully comfortable, though. And I feel safer and more cherished in his embrace than I do in Irvine's.whoa, okay, this is scary. Me and Nida? That's ridiculous! But if it's so ridiculous, why does it sound so right? she wondered in confusion. This was way too much, too fast. Not fully pulling away from the warmth of his arms, she spoke up with a ghost of a smile, "Can we have our flying lesson now. pleeease?" Nida's eyes slowly fluttered open and he looked down at the almost-smiling sunflower in his arms. It's not a dream; she's really here, in my arms, he thought with delight. He smiled broadly down at her, dimples appearing on his cheeks-Whoa, he's got dimples? I love dimples! Irvine doesn't have them, Selphie thought in surprise-and unclasped his arms from around her waist. "Sure thing, Sunshine. Come on, let's go. I'll go tell Commander Leonhart, just so that he doesn't freak out if the Garden begins moving," he said with a grin and trotted enthusiastically away from the Quad to find the aforementioned Commander. Selphie followed more slowly, pondering her thoughts about Nida. She was almost out of the Quad when she spotted a familiar cowboy hat shuffling behind a tree. If it's that ass Irvine expecting forgiveness, he's got another thing coming, she thought angrily, striding closer to the tree. When she was but a few feet away, she heard giggling and in a feminine voice, "Oh Irvy. I can't believe you were going out with that twit on the Garden Committee. she's just so wrong for you!"  
  
Selphie froze in shock, not trusting her ears. Had she just heard some slut with her Irvine? But that was impossible, he'd left for Deling, hadn't he? She shook her head in a daze, but before a coherent thought could form itself in her head, Irvine's deep baritone broke through. "Tell me about it. You're so much more my type Arayna," he said with a chuckle. Selphie finally stepped beyond the tree, where she came upon the sight of a hatless and tousle-haired Irvine tangled in the arms of a voluptuous redhead. Her eyes widened in shock and her mouth dropped open-so this is how he 'thought' about their relationship when he was off in Galbadia by himself, which some cheap whore that would give him what she wouldn't because she felt she wasn't ready. That deceiving, two-timing, horny little son-of-a-bitch! She couldn't believe his nerve, going at it with some girl in the middle of the Quad. And to think she'd spent countless nights crying over him, wondering when he would be coming back and accepting his apologies without a second thought. what a fool she had been; she'd actually believed he loved her like she loved him. Had, like she had loved him. "If your tongue was any further down her throat, it'd reach her stomach," she said, her voice cold and void of emotion. She was shocked beyond her ability to feel pain. "Oh, if it isn't the head of the Garden Festival Committee herself. What brings you here?" the redhead asked with a smirk, kissing Irvine. "That vermin atop you I used to call a boyfriend," Selphie retorted, emerald eyes blazing. "Really? Well, do you mind? We're kinda busy here," Arayna said with a giggle, pulling Irvine to her once more. Selphie glared hatefully, for a moment considering ending their rendezvous with a well-placed kick to Irvine's manly pride-- his behind. Deciding she was more mature than that, she turned on her heel and fled, tears blurring her vision. He hadn't said a word at all; he hadn't even looked at her. There was no way Irvine was buying his way out of this one; Selphie was too hurt to forgive this time. Not looking where she was going, she crashed into what felt like a wall. (Hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more inside. All the money in the world Could never add up to all the love I have inside) Nida flinched as a blur of yellow and brown collided forcefully with him. He had been on his way back to the Quad to inform Selphie of Commander Leonhart's approval. Immediately, he reached an arm out to catch whomever it was that had crashed into him. Selphie clung to him and began sobbing against his chest. "Whoa, Sefie, what happened? Why are you crying like this?" he asked, utterly confused. "Irvine. *sob*. some girl. *sniffle*. kissing. *whimper*. behind tree," she managed between sobs. Nida clenched his fist in rage. Damn that asshole. he doesn't have enough with walking out on her, nooooo, he has to go and make out with some other girl in the Quad. Damn him, damn him for doing this to Selphie, he thought angrily. He wrapped his other arm about Selphie's slim waist and stroked her hair soothingly. "Shh. it's okay, I'm here. Don't cry, it's alright. shh," he whispered. Eventually, Selphie's sobs subsided and were replaced by slight sniffles. Even then, Nida still held her, whispering soothing consolations into her ear and stroking her hair. The sniffles gave way into hiccups, yet still Nida held her. And if it were up to him, he would never let go. Selphie cocked her head up to look at him. "Nida, why are you doing this?" she questioned softly, eyes still shining with unshed tears. "Because." he began, looking hopelessly at her. (I love you. And I will give it to you, All I can give, all I can give. All. everything I have is for you, You.you. you.you. What I need, My love is all that I have to give All that I have is for you My love is all.) "Wait, don't answer that in words," she interrupted him, standing on tiptoe to halt his words with a soft kiss. Nida was too shocked to respond for a bit. Is this really happening? Hyne, has my dream come true? Is Selphie in my arms, kissing me? Great Hyne, it is true. She's here, right now, with me, not Irvine, me. Bliss washed over him again as he tightened his grip on her waist and kissed her back with all the pent-up passion of a year and a half of longing. Parting for breath, Selphie smiled brightly up at him. "Now, about that piloting lesson?" (Love is all I have to give. to you) 


End file.
